Modern Communication Basics Everyone Should Know

You may have brilliant ideas, but if your ability to communicate them is mediocre, people will judge the ideas as mediocre too. That is why communication is the most valuable currency of the 21st century. We make decisions about people based on how pleasant they are to deal with — content is not always what matters most. Often it is the style, the manner and the attitude behind the words. Communication is the adhesive that decides who becomes truly successful. This article is about turning your communication skills into the main reason for your achievements.

The science of communication begins with listening

The science of communication studies how information is sent and received. To become a genuinely communicative person, you need to develop three skills:

• The ability to listen. Communication is a dialogue, yet far too often a speaker forgets the other person entirely and focuses only on themselves and their own comfort. Being here and now, and listening one hundred percent to the other person, is where successful communication starts. A communicative person is always attentive to the one they are speaking with.
• Creative writing. Writing expands the possibilities of language. It organises your thoughts in a unique way, forcing you to weigh individual words, sentence structures and the overall message — which is exactly how it prepares you to speak.
• Speaking. There is an unwritten rule that you need at least six hours of real public-communication situations under your belt before you can start playing with the tools and actually begin to enjoy the process.

But let us return to the first recommendation — listening. Bill Gates, for instance, was known precisely for his ability to be fully present with whoever he was talking to: hearing every word, reading every gesture, sensing the other person's overall state, and responding accordingly. Often far more about our ideas, or our character, is revealed by a sigh, the position of our hands or a lowered eyelid than by what we actually say. A listener who notices this can respond far more adequately and build much deeper, more honest contact.

The signals to read in any conversation

Next time you talk with someone, pay attention to these expressions:

• Breathing and sighs. A sigh signals that something is troubling the other person — an unresolved problem. It can also be your opening to learn how you might help.
• Parasitic movements. When someone starts touching themselves (often a faint scratching motion) or fiddling with a pen or another object, it reveals their inner state and their attitude toward the topic.
• Tension. Raised shoulders or stiff movements can point to anxiety and insecurity — a sign that the question which triggered them may be an Achilles heel.
• Speech speed and rhythm. Notice when someone's pace slows. People instinctively slow down on the topics that are more interesting, closer or more dramatic to them — valuable information about the person in front of you.
• Overall calm. Sense the person's general state. Imagine you are one giant ear taking in every signal at once. Is the state calm? Does it shift? What provokes those shifts?

Communication is a decathlon

Communication is a decathlon — it is made up of countless gears, mechanisms, components and skills, and each must be trained to an equally high level. Like an athlete, you have to practise every one of them. If you want to develop your communication skills, you have to develop your ability across many different types of communication, each of which is a discipline in its own right: everyday conversation, the phone call, written messages, the formal presentation, the difficult negotiation, the online meeting, and more.

How to develop your communication skills

The first thing to recognise is that your main training ground is your everyday communication — in shops, on the phone, at home, at work, at conferences, in online meetings. From there:

1. Train each type deliberately. Every genre of communication is a whole science with libraries written about it. Start slowly and patiently. Keep a separate notebook for each genre, collect the tools that work, and put them to use in daily life.
2. Build your own platform. Start a podcast, a YouTube channel or regular Facebook Live sessions. Developing communication skills demands regularity, and the best way to force yourself to work is to make a public promise — for example, a new episode every Wednesday.
3. Seek feedback. Attend public-speaking courses so you collect feedback on your skills from as many angles as possible. Hands-on, practical classes are an excellent way to begin your growth.

The theories worth knowing

A handful of communication theories help explain why conversations succeed or fail:

• Linear theory sees communication as a simple line, with information passed from a sender to a receiver. It emphasises transmission and reception but ignores context.
• Interactive theory treats communication as a two-way process in which sender and receiver swap roles, and it includes feedback and dialogue.
• Systems theory views communication as a complex system of interacting components, paying close attention to context and culture, and to the fact that it is constantly changing.
• Symbolic interaction holds that communication happens through symbols and language, which in turn opens the door to interpretation.
• Sociocultural theory highlights the cultural norms, values and traditions that shape the type and style of communication.
• Constructivism stresses that communication is subjective: people construct meaning and reality from their own experiences, beliefs and interpretations.

In conclusion

Communication skills are not only the most valuable currency of the 21st century — they are also the most undervalued. They are still treated as "soft" skills, still not a compulsory part of how we are taught to live. Yet when people are drawn to you, and you have built an excellent professional network that helps you grow, you realise just how enormous a role the ability to communicate plays. If you want to take the next step and stand out as a speaker, read our guide on how to be a great public speaker — and then start your own journey into this world.